the girl who sheds herself jyst to kerp you alive like a snake sheds its skin to keep itself alive. she's like an umbrella in rain of blood and thorns. i feel like i never really felt love or emotions in my life, i dont think ive ever cried in front of anyone. i don't think ive cried much. i never knew how to blend in, i never had friends, just acquaintances, just people, just nothingness. feels like i was just passing time before her. i have not smiled in a long time. i do smile at her acts, shes like an angel. taught me how to love someone, the someone was her obviously. i love her. she cared alot for me, i never felt cared about in my life. i craved a family. she was family now. i craved feeling emotions. she was emotions now. i craved love. she was my love. but i realize now how broken to the core i was, after all she's done for me, i couldn't keep her. you know why? Cause

and yes im a pity fuck who will cry out loud about this till i die. i have "fixed" myself for her but will that take away the pain i gave her or will that bring her back to me? looking at my kismet, probably not. so fuck your philosophy and fuck redemption. good-fucking-bye.